When I was taught metta at an IMS retreat this summer (click here for part one and here for part two of this series) they encouraged us to go easy when we started sending metta to an enemy. I chose a family member that I have some friction with. As my practice has grown over the past few weeks I started to choose people who annoyed or irritated me. I started noticing a subtle shift in me about those folks; they didn’t seem quite so annoying anymore.

Loving my enemy.

When the tenth anniversary of September 11th (click here for my remembrances of 9-11) arrived, I was home only nine days from my retreat. I woke up agitated and found meditation particularly difficult that morning. It occurred to me that maybe the world could use a little more love on this day. It was the first time I did what I call the full metta practice on my own. However, instead of starting with me I started with my sister, a direct survivor of the attacks on the World Trade Center. Then I sent metta to myself, my benefactor, my extended family and a neutral person. Then it was time to send Loving-Kindness to my enemy. “Who is my enemy?” I wondered. My mind immediately went to the hijackers. I paused, feeling aversion rise up in my body for a moment and yet I was committed to have this new practice be a source of healing on this day. After a moment I got the courage to send metta to the hijackers, “may you be safe, may you be happy,” etc . . . As I recited the wishes, I felt what could only be described as a melting in my heart. My experience was that a piece of my heart that had been frozen for ten years had softened and started to melt. Energy moved and blood flowed into a part of me that I had unknowingly shut off a decade ago.

Love for all beings.

I thought of the hijackers’ families, the children they had left behind, the communities that trained them, the people who fed and housed them, the circumstances that brought them to that moment of destruction, the system and context that produced such terror and horror. I finished the metta practice with my wishes for all beings. In that moment I began to understood what it meant to be connected to all beings. Each and every person, animal or living entity seen or unseen, regardless of crimes committed, perceived value of that being or even their political persuasion.

It has been several weeks since September 11, 2011, and I have sent metta to members of the Tea Party, the NY Yankees, Republicans, all politicians, any group or entity that I have avoided or turned away from. Any person or group I judge or threw up my hands in frustration saying, “what were they thinking,” have all received metta.

Being committed to love.

With this practice I find I am just a little softer, a little calmer, less judgmental and experiencing compassion not from a place of pity or worry but as a lived experience of balance and connection.

I ask you to join me in this Loving-Kindness practice. If you want to connect about it or learn how to do it send me a note to [email protected].