The Seven Stones Blog

Sufficient Transitions: Dreaming a New Dream (Part 4 of 7)

By Shea Adelson

Telling the Truth is an act of Sufficiency. Being in this conversation is an invitation into rigorous honesty about ourselves, about what we have, about where we are precisely, and about what we desire – where we want to go. On this journey of discovering the art, anatomy and gifts of Transitions, we find ourselves in the middle, literally of the course, and in the middle of a Transition, otherwise known as the Neutral Zone.

The Neutral Zone is no where. In the poetic words of the master teacher of transitions, William Bridges, “[The neutral zone] is a season of dormancy when life withdraws back into the root to get ready for a long, cold season without whatever had given warmth and meaning to life-before-the-ending. It is a strange no-man’s-land between one world and the next. It is a zone where you pick up mixed signals, some coming from the past and some from the future. Sometimes the signals jumble into noise, while at other times they cancel each other out, leaving only an eerie silence. It is a low-pressure area, where all kinds of heavy weather is drawn into the vacuum left by the loss. It is a dark night of the heart – or, maybe a long dark twilight that refuses to resolve itself, into either real day or true night.” (The Way of Transitions, p. 156)

What Neutral Zones are you in?

Dream in the Neutral Zone. Anything is possible. This “gap” between events – of endings and beginnings – is some of the most fertile and open terrain of our lives, waiting for cultivation and ripe of creativity. It can also paralyze a lot of us. We are apt to want to return to the old ways, the comfortable norms of our life before whatever change dropped us in the middle of this desert. We are hopeful and afraid. And that is Ok. Whatever we are, is Ok.

What are you dreaming about?

We start by telling about our truths.
It’s chaotic in the Neutral Zone. It’s hard to see, as if at twilight, and we are not sure which direction to go, so much is possible. So we start with what we know now. Some of us might focus on what we want. Some of us might focus on where we are currently. Either way, start with being honest, rigorously real with yourself. Get specific. Be precise. And get to know both, the crystallized dream – your vision, and exactly where you are, right now.

What do you desire? Really dream about?
What is your current situation?

Allow the tension of the truths to exist.
Do not fudge on what you want, do not lower your expectations and change your desires for any reason. At least not yet. And do not lie about where you are. Not about your money, your sex life, your job, your parenting. Telling the truth will set you free.

This is how paradigm shifts occur.
This is the starting point. Like the invisible bridge that you can only see if you step across it. You create the way as you go, from where you are to where you want to go. You don’t think your way. You don’t talk your way. You walk. You move. You make it happen as you go. You invent the process as you proceed. You are motivated by your vision, you are grateful for where you’ve been. You trust in your assets, you call for the resources. Your actions will line up in service for your dream. It feels like magic because you are seeing the results (you want) without seeing the entire process leading to those results.

Sufficiency offers us the trust we need to be in reality about our life and in reality of what we desire. That is creative tension that will be resolved if we are clear and honest with ourselves about our realities. We practice deep and brutal honesty with ourselves to cross through the uncertainty towards that which we declare we desire. Telling the truth is a Tool of Sufficiency and a tool of the art of the paradigm shift.

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