two_paths

We always get to choose who to be in any moment.  At a fundraiser I attended this week, the moment of choice was more obvious than it often is. In this case, my choice was between being my full adult self and contributing whatever I could from that place. Or, I could be just a small part of myself—quiet, shy, sticking close to the one person I knew in the room.

First let me say that events where nobody wears jeans get me wondering if anyone will realize that I am only masquerading in this professional, adult costume, so I was already a bit nervous on my way. When I entered the crowded room, I saw lots of well-dressed people all already engaged in conversation. I joined an acquaintance and her friends and she assured me that I could hang out with her. This was both reassuring and frankly, not. I pictured myself standing next to her all night like a toddler clinging to her mommy. I didn’t like that idea, but then again, I didn’t know anybody else.

In a moment alone while getting a beverage I had the spontaneous recognition that I had a choice of acting like I was enough already, or not.  I heard myself make the declaration:  “I am interested in these people and I’m worthy of knowing them.” My experience was altered.  I became comfortable, engaged, curious, and open. I was being myself.

As the night progressed I contributed some of my own personal, unique assets (I had just completed a great exercise from our Enough Already course that brings your assets into view for yourself) in various ways. I injected a bit of humor at a moment during the presentations when people needed a bit of levity. I also offered some support to the hostess who needed some encouragement. If I had opted for a different declaration, one more suited to the timid toddler version of the night, I would not have made those contributions. Whether we realize it or not, we are always operating from some declaration about ourselves. When I first walked into the event, I was operating from a declaration something like, “I don’t really belong here”. We are quite vested in these declarations even though they are usually so faint that we don’t consciously notice them. They literally create who we are and our impact on our environment. And the truth is: we can declare … anything!

Think about it for yourself: What are you declaring about yourself in the various environments you work and live in? How do your experiences differ based on what you’ve declared? How do the results you produce differ? Which of your unique assets are expressed? Which are not?